Five Star Bad Boy by Melanie Marchande

Author:Melanie Marchande [Marchande, Melanie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-02-05T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter Nine

Lissy

My family, of course, wants to go “clothes shopping in the city.” After living here for as long as I have, I’m no longer enamored of the many boutiques and stores that send tourists into a frenzy. And not just because it’s so hard to find anything that fits me there.

Thankfully, my family’s respective budgets keep us from spending too long in the places where the clerks seem like they’re staring through your soul if you’re over a size two. We’re at a place that’s more my speed now, and I might actually pick up a few things. I could probably use some pajamas that don’t have holes in them.

It’s February, which naturally means that the swimsuits are out. I find myself looking for a little too long at the bikinis.

I mean, maybe M’s right. Maybe it really can be as simple as making a decision, squeezing myself into a swimsuit, and daring the world to judge me.

Dean and I haven’t discussed what happened last night. He was already awake when I got up, so I’m not even sure if he spent the night in my bed.

Whatever. It’s not worth thinking about. It’s not like it…meant something, or anything like that.

My hand drifts across a rack and stops on something strappy with a pretty nice green pattern.

“Really?” Dean grins at me. “I thought for sure that was just the champagne talking when you started asking me about bikinis again.”

“Yeah, well.” I pick up the bottoms and stretch them out to full size, cringing a little. Is that really what I look like? “I’ve been thinking about it.”

“Thinking,” he repeats. He’s skeptical and I don’t know why, but it bugs me.

“I talked to a friend,” I admit, finally, to get him off my back. He doesn’t need to know who the “friend” is. “I realized maybe I’ve been unfair to myself.”

And unfair to you.

I didn’t want to think about it at the time, but all that stuff about turning off the lights during sex and shooting down ideas of sexy outfits - yeah, that was me. I didn’t realize how I was probably chipping away at Dean’s ego in little bits and pieces, every time I unknowingly demonstrated that I didn’t really care how sexy he thought I was. My own insecurities mattered more.

Nothing excuses what he did, but if I could go back and do it over? I’d be different. I would, in the immortal words of M, wear a damn bikini.

It’s too late now, of course. Sure, we had sex last night - a few times - but I’m not getting entangled with him again. Now that I know what kind of person he is, I’d be insane to let him get under my skin. But there’s no harm in a little no-strings-attached fun.

I can picture Jack giving me a very disapproving look. I brush it away.

In the end, I find myself in a fitting room with a couple “fatkinis” slung over my arm. That’s what they call them on the fashion blogs, I think.

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